The Hidden Handbrake

By Alex Hartmann

Have you ever given something everything you had and expected something amazing to happen, only to unknowingly sabotage yourself and your success? That was essentially my 2019 season in a nutshell.

Actually, if I look back on it and be brutally honest with myself, that’s been every season since the 2016 Rio Olympics.

I had it in my mind that the 2016 Rio Olympic Games would change my life. I’d finally get a couple sponsors, make a little money and would be able to help provide for my family and those around me. I truly believed I was unstoppable.

None of that happened.

Instead, after being run out in the heats of the 200m, I sat by myself on the side of the pool in the village and cried for the first time in years. I had failed. I’d let myself down and I’d let everyone around me down. The unstoppable me had been crushed, completely.

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